A woman is cleaning her bathroom...
...and slips. She does the splits and suctioned herself to the floor.
She calls her husband.
"I'm kinda stuck to the floor...".
He tries to lift her, but can't do it. So he calls a plumber.
They both tried to pull her up, to no avail.
So he says "I'm sorry, but I think we'll have to break the tiles to get her free, and the hospital should do the rest.".
Then the husband says "Hey, we could fondle her instead.".
The plumber, flabbergasted, says "Why?".
"If we get her wet enough, we can slide her over to the kitchen. The tiles there were only $30 per square foot.".
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Joke